We internalize negative things and externalize positive things. When a guy gives me the silent treatment, it must be my fault (internalizing blame). When I get good grades, it was because the course wasn't difficult (externalizing accomplishments). So it becomes a never-ending cycle of feeling badly about ourselves.
One thing I know is that no matter who you are, you deserve to be respected. No one deserves ridicule, lies, mistreatment, neglect, etc. Therefore, this kind of disrespect falls judgment on the person who is being disrespectful instead of the one who is being disrespected.
I value the people in my life who are respectful toward me. Sometimes honesty hurts, but that's okay. Life hurts, love heals. We all disappoint one another eventually, but the nature of the hurt matters. I have hurt people maliciously, because of cowardice, unknowingly, and lovingly - all very different things. Respecting someone does not require always meeting their expectations. It means letting them down with integrity.
So thank you to those who love me enough to respect me. I am going to make a conscious effort to respect the people in my life. I think I can commit to treating others well, without condition. I would rather fail trying than succeed not.
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